Overcome shyness once and for all
Figure out what makes you feel shy.
Do you become shy in front of audiences?
When learning a new skill?
When venturing into a new situation?
When surrounded by people you know and admire?
When you don't know anyone somewhere?
Try to pinpoint the thoughts that go through your head right before the shyness hits.
Then come up with some "I" statements that you can repeat to yourself, like a mantra, to head off those thoughts: "I can do this", "I look good", "I have something to offer", etc.
Build your self confidence.
Everyone has some special gift or trait to offer to the world. It may sound corny, but it's true.
Think about what you know, what you can do, and what you have accomplished, rather than fixating on how you look, sound, or dress.
Keep in mind that everyone, even the "beautiful people", has something about themselves or their life that they don't like.
There's no particular reason why your "problem" should make you shy while their "problem" doesn't make them shy
Make new friends. Talk to somebody you would not normally think about having a conversation with. Try to find people who share one or more of your interests and find excuses to talk to them. It is great practice for more daring behavior, such as talking to popular, charismatic people. Initiate conversation with a simple starter, such as, "That's a nice bag, where did you get it?" or "It's really nice outside, don't you think?" Most people are good-natured and will be welcoming to your advances. People often indicate that they are interested in conversing by starting this way, so learn to take the bait when it arises, and try to say as much in response as possible.
Try doing stuff you never dreamed you would. Doing something really outlandish, like sky diving, will: a) provide an endorphin rush; and b) give you a story to tell when you are making conversation with people. And if you can find the courage to do something that big, then something like talking to a cute girl/guy should seem easy.
Don't compare yourself to others. - The more you compare yourself to others, you will feel that you are not able to measure up and the more intimidated you will feel, which will make you shyer.
Follow the rules, but don't overdo it - You should actually let yourself go out of the box a bit and loosen up. You don't have to be uptight about everything you do. If you are trying to conform to the standards wherever you go, you'll probably have feeling that you are not doing something right and are more likely to clam up. Try not to over obsess on what everyone thinks about you. Nobody really cares and people do like fun and exciting people. That makes this world more exciting. Just follow the rules at the basic level, such as dress nicely when you are going to a funeral or such.
Do you become shy in front of audiences?
When learning a new skill?
When venturing into a new situation?
When surrounded by people you know and admire?
When you don't know anyone somewhere?
Try to pinpoint the thoughts that go through your head right before the shyness hits.
Then come up with some "I" statements that you can repeat to yourself, like a mantra, to head off those thoughts: "I can do this", "I look good", "I have something to offer", etc.
Build your self confidence.
Everyone has some special gift or trait to offer to the world. It may sound corny, but it's true.
Think about what you know, what you can do, and what you have accomplished, rather than fixating on how you look, sound, or dress.
Keep in mind that everyone, even the "beautiful people", has something about themselves or their life that they don't like.
There's no particular reason why your "problem" should make you shy while their "problem" doesn't make them shy
- Smile and make eye contact. A simple smile in the direction of a stranger may brighten your day, and it will brighten theirs, too! Smiling is a friendly way to acknowledge others, and it makes a pretty good lead-in to start a conversation with anyone, stranger or friend. It breaks the ice and loosens up your facial muscles, too.
- Practice good posture and speaking clearly. Standing tall gives the world the impression that you are self-confident and receptive to others. Speaking clearly will help avoid the potential embarrassment of needing to repeat what you said due to mumbling or talking too quietly.
- Laugh often, but only at things you find genuinely amusing. It will help ease any tension you may be feeling and will make you feel more relaxed.
- Don't look preoccupied. Don't work on papers, text or do your make-up if you want someone to talk to you.
- Make a list of situations that make you feel anxious. Order them so that those things that cause you the least anxiety are first and those that cause you the most anxiety are last. Once you have a list of 10-15 stressful situations, start working through them, one-by-one. The first few "easier" situations will help build your confidence so that you can continue moving to more difficult situations on your list. Don't worry if you have to go backwards on the list sometimes; take it at your own pace, but make an effort to push yourself.
- Introduce yourself to one new person each day. It is often easier to talk with strangers, at least briefly. After all, you may never see them again, so who cares what they think about you?
Make new friends. Talk to somebody you would not normally think about having a conversation with. Try to find people who share one or more of your interests and find excuses to talk to them. It is great practice for more daring behavior, such as talking to popular, charismatic people. Initiate conversation with a simple starter, such as, "That's a nice bag, where did you get it?" or "It's really nice outside, don't you think?" Most people are good-natured and will be welcoming to your advances. People often indicate that they are interested in conversing by starting this way, so learn to take the bait when it arises, and try to say as much in response as possible.
Try doing stuff you never dreamed you would. Doing something really outlandish, like sky diving, will: a) provide an endorphin rush; and b) give you a story to tell when you are making conversation with people. And if you can find the courage to do something that big, then something like talking to a cute girl/guy should seem easy.
Don't compare yourself to others. - The more you compare yourself to others, you will feel that you are not able to measure up and the more intimidated you will feel, which will make you shyer.
Follow the rules, but don't overdo it - You should actually let yourself go out of the box a bit and loosen up. You don't have to be uptight about everything you do. If you are trying to conform to the standards wherever you go, you'll probably have feeling that you are not doing something right and are more likely to clam up. Try not to over obsess on what everyone thinks about you. Nobody really cares and people do like fun and exciting people. That makes this world more exciting. Just follow the rules at the basic level, such as dress nicely when you are going to a funeral or such.
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